Flickasbord, Volume 48

Just as I think that unrest within the 2,100 is no more, Zoe Lister-Jones has to infiltrate my thoughts with the pomposity and snootiness that she constantly displays in her movies. Let’s begin.

First up, despite the fact that I like Zoe Lister-Jones’ chemistry with Francis Benhamou in the movie “Arranged”, I’ve found her to be both way too pompous and way too snooty in movies that have since followed that one, such as “Band Aid” and the recently ousted “Consumed”. And with that being said, you can add “Stuck Between Stations” to that list, as her portrayal of the character “Rebecca” came off as unconvincing to me, thus I’ve revoked the overall guaranteed Flickuum status of that movie. And since the latter of those four movies is an overall guaranteed Flickuum, movie, I’ve decided to reinstate “The Campaign” via expediting it from Tier 7 to Tier 4. Okay, now I’m totally content with all 2,100 overall guaranteed Flickuum movies.

Well, Nadine Velazquez movies are now on moratorium until The Project finally resumes, as I completed my assessment of “Sister” during the wee hours of yesterday morning. And as to what I thought of it, well despite the presence of The Flickuum Queen, the movie had some aspects that were way too cringe, along with having a very inconsistent tone and a very rushed/unfinished feel during its final minutes, thus it unfortunately failed its assessment. Of course, The Flickuum Queen was tremendous even in failure to the point that I have it ranked one spot ahead of “Sharon 1.2.3.” on the Movie-Ocirty/Dishonorable Mention page. And that’s not the only silver lining that this poor unfortunate movie put forth because in addition, it A) Makes me want to have another Reid Scott movie compete March Madness style, B) Makes me want to have a Serinda Swan movie where she has a substantial role compete March Madness style and C) Makes me want to have a mulligan movie for Alexis Dziena for March Madness style competition since “Nick & Norah’s Infinite Playlist” has been permanently banned from The Project, as those three were castmates with The Flickuum Queen. And sure enough, I found movies that fit those three bills, with “Dean” featuring Reid Scott, “Recoil” featuring Serinda Swan, and an either/or for Alexis Dziena via the movies “Tenderness” and “Havoc”. Now let’s see if those three (possibly four) movies all make it to Tier 5.

Eight will be enough, as a grand total of eight post-April 20 pardons from the Movie-Ocrity/Dishonorable page have been and/or will be conducted. And as to why that total will increase to eight, well one, I think Sean Faris’ character in the movie “Forever Strong” doing a rugby chant in another language is way less obnoxious than Leon’s character doing the Swiss chant in “Cool Runnings” and I’m a big fan of the latter movie. And two, Genesis Rodriguez has been on moratorium since my evaluation of “Big Hero 6” nearly a year and a half ago, so I will pardon her movie “Delirium” for re-assessment, along with the aforementioned “Forever Strong”, thus making a stacked assessment/re-assessment roster even more stacked. Let’s see if both those movies can pass their re-assessments.

In a bit of quandary, the possible third failure of “The Post” puts its overall guaranteed Flickuum spot up for grabs, as that spot opened up for “Paws Of Fury: The Legend Of Hank” just as I made the move to obtain “Do Revenge” via hard copy. Furthermore, adding to that quandary is the fact that the Camila Mendes-Maya Hawk movie is ahead of the Michael Cera-Samuel L. Jackson movie in the Volume 44 chart pecking order, so the computer-animated movie will need something like “Road House ‘24” or “Dangerous Lies” to fail its re-assessment.

Before March Madness style battles finally end for The Flickuum Project, I’m hoping for at least one more Minka Kelly movie battling a Nadine Velazquez movie or Tiffani-Amber Thiessen movie with a fully guaranteed spot on the line, especially since the former of the three actresses was originally supposed to be The Flickuum Queen. And thanks to IMDB, that hope might happen if I can see her (Minka Kelly’s) collaboration with Maggie Grace, which is “Blackwater Lane”, before New Year’s Day 2026. However, there’s also no release date as of yet, so those Minka Kelly vs. Nadine Velazquez and/or Tiffani-Amber Thiessen March Madness style battles might not happen after all. Stay tuned.

And finally, lucky number 13 just became lucky number 7 times 2, as “Boy Kills World” passed its assessment and did so theatrically, thus making it the ninth consecutive movie to have a successful theatrical assessment, as well as the 14th overall in 2024. Now the baton is passed onto “Challengers”, although the Zendaya-led movie will be optioned as a 2,201 through 2,215 movie, due to both Amazon and Apple not listing it as a movie available for pre-order. So yeah, “Paws Of Fury: The Legend Of Hank” will get immediately placement in Tier 11 after all.

Well, it’s yet another day of hardly knocking movies off the current assessment/re-assessment roster, thus I might have to postpone The Flickuum resumption date to May 13. But we’ll see what I kind of rhythm that I can get into as soon as this entry posts.

Until the next time.